When I was a kid, the TV adventure serials and pre-movie shorts (remember those?) in the theaters were filled with dauntless heroes facing deadly peril in exotic lands. One of the most compelling of these was quicksand.
You be walking along when suddenly you, or more likely the lovely damsel with you (sorry ladies, that’s the way it was in the fifties) would step into a pool of quicksand. And yes, it was always a circular pool fortunately surrounded by solid ground. The better to rescue yourself or your companion.
Cool head that you were, you’d stay calm and not struggle. Or you’d coolly calm down your panicking companion and she’d (again, sorry ladies!) relax and follow your soothing instructions. These usually involved grabbing a handy nearby branch or vine and slowly pulling her or yourself clear. No mention was ever made as to how or when you cleaned all that damp, sticky sand from every crack and crevice.
When I got older and began to travel the world, somewhat to my dismay, I discovered that quicksand was seemly extremely rare and the odds of my rescuing some grateful damsel from it rarer still. Indeed not only did I never come across it, I never met anyone who had. Never even read about someone who had in the papers.
Another childhood myth shattered. Well, I wasn’t destined to win many desperate sword fights either.
I am not naturally a morning person, but here on the beach the glorious dawn with the sun rising up out of the lake is enough to get even me out of bed. Except for the lapping waves it is completely quiet and, at this time of year, there is not another soul to be seen.
The early morning of May 12th was cloudy, damp and a bit cool for the time of year. It had been raining for the last few days. As commonly happens, the waves had crested the sand bank on the beach and formed small pools behind it. This sand between the lake and the pools is most often firm, but can occasionally be soft. Sinking in an inch or two as you walk is not uncommon.
Walking along on one of these sand banks I noticed the sand go from firm to soft and gave it not a thought. Until one step too far where I sunk up to my knees. Quicksand!
And make no mistake, it was quick. Not as quick as…
“Lightning Sand”
…but quick.
One moment I am on the surface and the next I’m in up to my knees and trapped in a thick, wet, heavy sludge of sand.
Unlike the films of my youth, this quicksand had a bottom. Nothing firm you understand, just a point at which I stopped sinking. Very lucky this. Had this quicksand been, say, 6″2″ deep, it would have been good night Irene before I’d have had a chance to say “good night, Irene.” Here one moment, gone the next.* That would have made for a fine mystery.
Had it been just a few inches deeper there would have been no getting out of it and I’d have been stuck in the cold wet sand up to my whatever until the embarrassment of rescue. Which, remembering how nice and deserted the beach is this time of year, might have been sometime coming.
Once I stopped sinking, and remembering back to the TV serial lessons of my youth, I remained calm and took stock. There was not a branch or handy vine to be had. This was empty beach and Jake the Wonderdog was not about to go for help. He was just wondering why we’d stopped walking.
Not Lassie
While I’d stopped sinking and wasn’t in any real danger, I could also feel the sand start to solidify around my feet. If I was going to get out on my own, it would have to be, well, quickly.
Slowly I managed to pull my right foot free and there was firm ground close enough to give it purchase. But now it was bent under me providing little leverage to pry out the left which in pulling up the right had been driven deeper. So I started to dig.
Digging in wet sand is a fairly futile task. You pull out a handful of sand and the surrounding sand just flows in. None the less I managed to clear a bit away to about half way down my shin. Twisting my foot to break it loose this was enough to slowly pull it free.
I knelt there exhausted for a bit before I could stand, took two steps and began to sink again. There was no visual way to tell where the sand is solid and where it is quick.
Taking another lesson from my childhood adventure serials (when in quicksand lie flat on it) I dropped to my hands and knees and began to crawl. Once it felt solid again, I got up and walked the long way around.
My boots were filled with sand and my pants coated with it. Both are drying in the sun as I write.
What lessons are there here to learn?**
- Quicksand does exist!
- And it is really quick!
- Encountering it doesn’t get you the damsel.
- While they lied or ommittied on points #3, #5, #8 and #10; pay attention to the important lessons in the TV adventure serials of your youth.
- You can’t count on a handy branch or vine.
- Boots are not helpful.
- Once you start worrying about losing your boots, you are probably out of danger.
- Your dog is not going to recognize the problem. Unless he’s Lassie.
- Do your squats daily. You never know when having strong legs is going to come in handy.
- Cleaning the sand out of your boots, clothes and various cracks and crevices is the real problem with quicksand.
More cautionary tales:
*This doesn’t actually happen, for reasons I discovered when I Googled it afterwards. Since it not actually happening rather spoils the drama of the story, if you want to know why you’ll need to Google it for yourself.
**If you want actually useful information on quicksand and how to escape it, you’ll want to seek out better sources than my vaguely remembered lessons from old fiction films.
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For those of you who having been asking about Kibanda and how this project is going, I am working on a post to fill you in. As those old Serials used to say:
Stay tuned!
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Recent Interviews & Projects
Bigger Pockets Money Show: JL Collins Edition
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Chautauqua
Both weeks for Greece sold out have long been sold out. However, please feel free to put yourself on the:
Millennial Revolution — Chautauqua: Come Join the Family (This is a brilliant post with all the details!)
1500 Days to Freedom — Meet some awesome people… (Another brilliant post, this one with dinosaurs!)
ChooseFI — Oh, the Places we will go Chautauqua in the words of the speakers who will be in Greece. There is nothing quite like hearing the voices behind the words.
Also, be sure to listen to this incredible episode with Travis Shakespeare. Travis is a master story teller and, among other things, he shares three:
- How the FI movement fits into the cultural fabric of America and its traditions of rugged individuals charting their own course.
- The coming Playing with FIRE documentary
- How he decided to come to Chautauqua and what it has meant to him. One of the best insights I’ve heard or read yet.
Mad Fientist — Money Talks panel discussion at Chautauqua UK Attendees discussing FI and also a great inside look at the Chautauqua experience.
JL Collins — Greece 2018 Mount Olympus
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Old Post
Every now and again I get a comment on an old post. It is always nice to see those getting some attention and it is fun, for me anyway, to re-read them. Maybe you too. Here’s one:
Personal Capital; and how to unload your unwanted stocks and funds
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